You’re Not Broken - Sarah Woodhouse

• Found it really useful and interesting. She explains trauma loops and responses in a really clear way and breaks down and lists what some of the patterns look like and give clear examples of responses and behaviours. It’s written from a research + lived experience angle which is always something I look for. Highly recommend if you’re interested in learning more about trauma.

Maybe Baby - Sue Saunders

• Written by a New Zealand fertility counsellor focusing on the emotional aspects of potential infertility and the options that are available. A topic on my mind currently as we are trying for a baby and it is taking longer than we thought.

The Body Keeps the Score - Bessel Van Der Kolk

• Fascinating and complex book. Slow read as some of the examples are intense and the content is thought provoking. All in all a must read for those who are working with people with trauma histories. The book covers what trauma is, what’s happening in the brain and body, attachment, memory and paths to recovery. At the core it brings back all diagnoses to a common core: “If we look beyond the list of specific symptoms that entail formal psychiatric diagnoses, we find that almost all mental suffering involves either trouble in creating workable and satisfying relationships or difficulties in regulating arousal”

• He highlights how complex PTSD was suggested by a working group for the 1997 DSM-IV but was not included, and is still not recognised. Also states that CBT works for only 1/3 of traumatised people. Prolonged exposure/desensitisation can retraumatise, desensitise but don’t reintegrate the trauma into the life arc (knowing it’s in the past). Trauma healing is a process that needs to include body based practices and reconnection.

Period Power - Maisie Hill

• I thought I was informed about my hormones and menstrual cycle but this book gave me a lot more information. It was engaging and informative, with complex concepts explained in easy to access ways. The book covers all aspects of periods, from onset through to menopause, and has useful tips if you’re wanting to become more aware of and manage your cycle. Highly recommend this book.

• It uses a framework of the different weeks of the cycle being like seasons and goes over the different kinds of energies and activities that might be best suited to those weeks, which is something I’m interested to look at and explore further. I’ve also found her free download cycle tracker a useful tool to start to document and be able to more easily see patterns in my own cycle.

The Missing Piece: A Woman's Guide to Understanding, Diagnosing and Living with ADHD by Julie Legg

• I really struggled with this book and it was difficult to put my finger on what it was that I didn't like as on paper it ticked a lot of what I look for in a non-fiction book: lived experience, multiple perspectives, topic relevant to me. Written by a late diagnosed female identifying New Zealand ADHDer, with examples and stories from other women throughout. The only redeeming feature was the final chapter titled 'Embracing our ADHD', here is where the compassion and talk of accommodations came in. Not one I would recommend. These were the things that didn't sit right with me:

  • Blame seemed to be very much with the individual, wishing things were different, tales of woe

  • Inaccurate definitions, e.g. using zoning out when instead it’s probably auditory processing

  • Incorrect use of neurodiverse to describe an individual when meaning neurodivergent

  • Lack of understanding around autism, uses functioning labels and states lack of empathy as inherent

  • Seems to push formal diagnosis without acknowledging the barriers to this

  • Puts success down to external factors, medication, understanding partners - not to the person

  • No acknowledgement of co-occurring conditions and intersectionality

Stolen Focus - Johann Hari

• Some mixed feelings about this one but overall an interesting and thought provoking look at how increasing volumes of information overwhelms our attentional capacity and we have less time for depth and reflection and how there are only so many things we can do individually with tech systems designed to catch and hold our attention. A couple of key points that stuck out to me:

  • The myth of multitasking, actually switching back and forth between the tasks , doing both less effectively, more slowly, more errors, less creative (time for making links, reflection, innovation), remember and learn less - practice mono tasking - flow is only possible when mono tasking, need a clearly defined goal, doing something that is meaningful to you, doing something at the edge of your abilities but not beyond them

  • Slowness nurtures attention, speed shatters it; we need to slow down, do one thing at a time and sleep more; more noise and distractions are harder to filter; to pay attention we need to feel safe: stress, trauma -> hypervigilance and attention issues, there can be structural changes in the brain with long term stress

  • Mind wandering is part of attention, we need time away from direct focus or distraction to make connections, take a step back, space to make sense of the world (when in low stress and safety, otherwise becomes rumination); this is why a 4 day work week increases productivity; Default mode network, brain is still active when not directly focused on something 

  • Systemic issues related to declining attention: tech designed to keep us engaged with it and distracted, algorithms, surveillance capitalism, food advertising and supply systems, brain inflammation from chemicals and pollution, individualistic culture seeing issues as the person’s fault, current school systems not set up for learning (need intrinsic motivation, meaning, movement and play for developing attention)

• Where things felt a bit icky was a comment around trauma as a cause of ADHD when I think he means a contribution to increased symptoms. He also raised concerns of over medicating of children without looking for what else might be going on, and advocates for healing childhood trauma and creasing safety to reduce hypervigilance. For ADHD he emphasises looking at the environment and a why for the behaviours, not using meds as a first option, seeing how stress and chaos in early life contribute to the development of symptoms, the importance of social support. In some respects I agree with parts of what he is saying and do think we need to look at the environment and increasing safety, while building strategies, but that doesn’t mean a tool like medication isn’t also needed

• He wraps up with a call for change - “Your individual efforts to improve your attention can be dwarfed by an environment full of things that wreck it”

  • Individual changes - stop switching tasks so much lock phone away, instead of shaming self into focusing support getting into a flow state, take time off social media, letting the mind wander is a crucial part of attention eg go for a walk without distraction, get enough sleep, support free play with any children in your life

  • Larger systemic change for reclaiming attention: ban surveillance capitalism, four day work week, rebuild childhood around free play; need to move from a growth economy to a steady state economy, shift the values; “we can only solve the climate crisis if we solve the attention crisis “

Better Late Than Never - Emma Mahoney

• Overall a good read with a light and conversational tone with useful examples, balanced view with the negatives and positives without being overly negative or flipping the other way into a superpower narrative. Says self diagnosis isn’t reliable due to poor self regard, which I don’t agree with and there were a couple of other similar moments in the book.

• Clear descriptions of what ADHD is and isn’t, with 3 key traits 3 traits: restlessness, distractibility, impulsivity 

• Loved this quote on therapy being helpful - “It is part of the complexity of the condition that when you feel emotionally held, encouraged and made to feel powerful, you feel you can tackle any challenge thrown at you”

What Happened to You - Bruce Perry and Oprah Winfrey

• I’m not a huge fan of interview style books, but there was still some useful content in here.

Love and Autism - Kay Kerr

• Some really relateable stories on love and other relationships from the perspectives of multiple autistic people.

Laziness Does Not Exist - Devon Price

• I had so many thoughts about this one I wrote a whole blog. Highly recommend.

How Emotions Are Made: The Secret Life of The Brain - Lisa Feldman Barrett

• Turns the standard theory of emotion on its head. Thought provoking and thoroughly interesting.

Your Brain on Art: How The Arts Transform Us - Susan Magsamen, Ivy Ross

• The neuroscience of art and why engaging in the arts and aesthetics is so important to our wellbeing.

Lost Connections: Uncovering The Real Causes of Depression - And The Unexpected Solutions - Johann Hari

• Some really interesting thoughts on mental illness from the perspective of pain as a message that something is wrong, not a malfunctioning brain that can be medicated away, we need to stop only looking at and treating the symptoms and get to the deeper problem, ask what’s happening in a person’s life - which is very much my approach. This quote struck me “What if depression is, in fact, a form of grief - for our own lives not being as they should? What if it is a form of grief for the connections we have lost, yet still need?” (p44) - he suggests we need social not individual solutions, the biomedical narrative misses so much

• Describes 9 causes of depression and anxiety, “ways we have been cut off from something we innately need but seem to have lost along the way” (p59): Disconnection from meaningful work, disempowerment; Disconnection from other people, loneliness; Disconnection from meaningful values, extrinsic goals, real needs go unmet; Disconnection from childhood trauma, depression a normal response to abnormal life experiences, asking what happened to you instead of what’s wrong with you; Disconnection from status and respect, comparison, the more unequal the society the more prevalent all forms of mental illness are; Disconnection from the natural world, lack of access to the kind of landscape we evolved in, importance of movement in nature, finding awe in the bigness of nature to get some perspective; Disconnection from a hopeful or secure future, no larger framework of significance, loss of a bigger picture; Brain changes, brain changes to meet your needs, pruning synapses you don’t use, growing those you do use; Genetic component, genes increase the sensitivity, environment switches it on

• 7 ways of reconnection: To other people, being connected and supported, collective way of looking at life; Social prescribing, ways to connect with the people around you, common goal, purpose, shared experience, seeing the bigger picture; To meaningful work - making a difference, respect, dignity, seeing results from our work, having a purpose; To meaningful values - what is important in life, intentional choices, intrinsic motivation; Sympathetic joy, and overcoming addiction to self - getting out of the scarcity mindset, sympathetic joy for cultivating the opposite of jealousy or envy; Acknowledging and overcoming childhood trauma - validation and acceptance, compassion, reducing the shame, releasing it; Restoring the future - experiment with universal basic income, collective solutions to free up space for the important things, collective action for social change

• “We need to move from "focusing on 'chemical imbalances' to focusing on 'power imbalances.' …You aren't a machine with broken parts. You are an animal whose needs are not being met. You need to have a community. You need to have meaningful values, not the junk values you've been pumped full of all your life, telling you happiness comes through money and buying objects. You need to have meaningful work. You need the natural world. You need to feel you are respected. You need a secure future. You need connections to all these things. You need to release any shame you might feel for having been mistreated.” (p256)

The Book of Burnout: What It Is, Why It Happens and How To Stop It Before It Stops You! - Bev Aisbett

• Easy to read book done with lots of cartoon illustrations. Good review covering:

  • Burnout as more than workplace burnout, different types and degrees, we all have different tipping points 

  • Categories: over it, done to death, unfinished business, push push push, superhero syndrome, plagued by fomo, bored stiff, taken to the limit

  • 3 symptom areas - energy depletion/exhaustion, negativity or cynicism, reduced efficacy

  • Stages - honeymoon phase, justification, martyrdom, creeping dissatisfaction, blame, envy, consciously unconscious, toast

  • Warning signs: physical - exhaustion, cravings , brain fog, more frequent illness, insomnia, weight gain/loss, flatline libido, signs of excess tension (eg headaches, tinnitus, blurred vision, skin irritation, neck and shoulder tightness, digestive problems), overeating, drinking, smoking. Emotional and psychological- easily irritated , lacking motivation, mood swings, depression, crying, relationship strain, panic attacks, anxiety

  • Fear as a driving force behind burnout- fear of: not having/being enough, being overlooked, speaking up, conflict, disappointment in yourself, letting others down, judgement/criticism, failure, feeling guilty, stopping, the future; proving something to self or others, shoulds; early messages about our worth and capabilities, expectations of others 

  • Things to do to avoid becoming burned out: detach, debrief, deliberate, decompress, emotional self awareness, emotional self control, adaptability, empathy, conflict management; stop feeding your stress, pace yourself, get out of defence mode, change your perspective, satisfaction in what you do, take care of your needs, home (rest peace security groundedness); saying no, delegate, prioritise your well-being, social time, life things on your to do list, know when to stop, be a friend to yourself

Taking Charge of Your Fertility by Toni Weschler and The Billings Method by Evelyn Billings

• Learning more about my cycles and fertility to get more in tune and support the efforts to have a baby. These were more for personal learning than for work, but still useful information for getting more in tune with menstrual cycles.